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Poor and Transgender or Genderqueer's Journal
 
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Friday, July 18th, 2003

Time Event
8:43a
Let's go girls, I need your advice!
Okay, so my mother is going out of town with my sibling and that leaves me home alone to take pictures!

Okay, pictures are one thing, but I want to go out in public too, like to see my psych and do other stuff.

Some people: Sounds like a great opportunity! So lucky!
Other people: How dare you grace this community with your PRATTLE!
Me: But I...
Other people: Now I'm gonna STRANGLE you to death for your arrogance.
Me: o.o Wha...
Other people: Hah ha, just kidding ^_^
Me: -_- Wooo, good because I really need adv...
Other people: I'M GONNA STAB YOU INSTEAD YOU CANKER BLOSSOM!
Me: EEEEEEEHHHHHH!!! O.O

Anywho...

Before I was REALLY excited but of course I'm starting to get anxious.

Like what if I look really bad? What if I sound horrible? Will I be spotted? I pass really well (without trying) I think what I'm really afraid of is getting caught. My mother finds out I'm dead, she already hates the idea of me having gender dysphoria, if she found out I was in public she'd KILL ME!

I need all of the advice I can get to allay my fears.

I know a big tip is to NOT go too big! Not to become cartoonish with clothing and makeup. I don't plan on wearing alot of make-up my hair will be as simple as I can get it. But my VOICE! The more feminine I try to sound the more masculine it seems to get! It seems that if I stick with my regular voice and try to sound like a MAN I won't get caught!

Okay so here's the specs:

I'm 19
5'9
Lithe yet long fingers
moderate palm size
121 pounds (size three women's clothing)
Hair shoulder length
Mahogany skin (Africana chocolate) ^.^
Hair is a brownish red
Almond shaped brown eyes
My eyebrows are of thinner than most people's pinky's (can it be shaped?)
I have no beard shadows (thank the GODDESS!)

I'm not sure what else to say...oh yeah. I think my head is HUGE! I think it may be the way I wear my hair (tied back, but it has so much VOLUME on the top that it puffs. Gotta love ethnic hair). My head ends up looking big...I'M SO WORRIED! Please help!

I promise to post pics too ^.~
Just make sure I don't come out all gargoylish =(

Current Mood: anxious

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