Lunarian Silhouette (red_hazel) wrote in transpauper,
Lunarian Silhouette

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Just as little Info

Hey Everyone names Lilith! Lilith Baalker!

That's my female name anyway. I'm a 19 year old person with gender dysphoria. I came out to MYSELF around the age of...well I KNEW when I was young. Feeling REALLY different from all the other children. I'm not sure if anyone else felt that way but I RESENTED feeling different, seeing other kids comfortable in their bodies and me feeling so...unhappy.

I started taking hormones and had to get off of them. I got a job, started going to a psych and she agreed that I have gender dysphoria. I started the hormones a little afterward and felt happy. Then I came out to my family (I uh...heh, still live with them) and they didn't take it very well.

My grandmother accused me of having demons burrrow into my CHEST! My mother said I did this just to embarass her and because I hate her so much.

Okay truth me KNOWN I can't STAND my mother. We're oil and water on EVERY subject. That doesn't mean I don't LOVE her. I just HATE her =/

That make sense?

Anyway, my grandmother is coming to terms with this (My family is me, my little brother who is STILL in the dark, my mom, and my grandmother) tomorrow I go to my FIRST support meeting! So exciting. It's like electricity.

I'm an artist (I drew 2 of icons you'll see at times), writer, and general Renassiance girl, ya know? My friends are supportive, but I know sometimes they don't know what to do with me. I haven't started living full time yet, but I have dressed up on occasion, actually been outside with ONCE.

My goodness the LIBERATION! I felt as if this FAKENESS I wear just melted away and I was me! I walked with confidence like a stonewall.

I was strong, I was invincible. I was SO frickin' woman!

Forgive me wierdness right now I woke up like and hour ago and it's 8:30 in the morning, I could be writing the theme to Les Miserables and not even know it.

Well I just wanted to do a little intro type of thing, sorry for cross posting!

By the way I love J-rock as well as anime and that goodness. DDR is greatness to me. Yes it is! ^.^

Off I go! Bye bye!
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